In Q & A, a weekly feature of Fantastic Fangirls, we ask our staff to tackle a simple question — then open the floor to comments.
What superhero would you want to be your next-door-neighbor?
In 1985, mutant Wanda Maximoff and Vision the android were married and moved to the New Jersey suburbs to “live a normal life”. Vision and the Scarlet Witch remains one of my favorite comic book storylines ever. It is a soap opera. There is a parade of supernatural figures on the attack: zombies, vampires, ghosts, demons, oh my! There are family reunions, extramarital affairs, a jilted lover, and of course, the now infamous magic pregnancy. It’s about as far from normal as it can be but just the mere fact that Wanda and Visz tried is so powerful to me. I love that trippy little story and if those two crazy kids ever want to try again, I absolutely welcome them into my neighbourhood.
My idea of a good neighbor is someone who minds his own business, most of the time, and is content to let me mind mine. Still, there will be times when he might want to borrow a cup of sugar or (for instance) I might need something chopped or cut down.
He probably mows the lawn shirtless, too. I’m just saying.
I live in an apartment and have never met my neighbors. But I still consider “home” to be my parents’ house, and when you actually own property neighbors are a lot more relevant. My dad has a garden that he really loves taking care of each summer, but New Jersey weather is unpredictable and sometimes his vegetables just don’t grow as well as he’d like them to. So, as a gift to him, I’d want our next door neighbor to be Storm. The control she’d exercise over the weather on her property (to help her own garden grow, of course) would extend to ours, making my dad’s garden lush and productive. And maybe, as a bonus, she could localize the melting of snow on our driveway, to save my dad’s back in the winter months. She’s such a kind person that I’m sure she wouldn’t mind offering the help, and as long as my family remembers to recycle, I think we’d get along just fine.
Man, they all have such unrestful lives! And the property damage! But, okay, positing a world with superheroes, in which such people have to live somewhere, I’m going to be perfectly selfish and say I want Oracle and the Birds of Prey as my next door neighbors. Because if my house is going to be collateral damage from time to time, I at least want smart, capable, determined, kick-ass, gorgeous women as my neighbors. And then at least I could ask them if they were gay, and if open relationships were a possibility.
I mean, as long as we’re dreaming.
So What about you? What superhero would you want to be your next-door-neighbor?